Monday, June 23, 2014

Guest Post (Waffle the Cat)

Let me get one thing straight: cats don't blog; we are way too cool for sitting in front of computer screens and typing. At the same time, cats are sometimes vindictive, and sometimes I can't help pulling my big yellow brother back down to earth.

So pay attention Oscar... You'll never believe the vacation I just had. It started last Wednesday, when I was duped into riding in my cat carrier for 50 minutes to the Aiken camp in North Hero. I hate that cat carrier.

To be sure, when Friday rolled around and it was time to leave, I stayed put. No matter how much they shook my food dish, I stayed out of sight. They left, and the party began.

First off, feeling guilty, they filled my food bowl half-full. If they should feel guilty about anything, it should be the fact that ordinarily they only put like 20 kibbles in that dish. How's a cat supposed to survive on that? I immediately went down and ate every bit of that high octane cat food in one sitting. Delicious!

Then I went into food-coma-relax mode for 14 hours before terrorizing the mice in the area for the next ten. Then I heard some commotion outside, so I hid in a dark corner. It was Gunnar's grandfather.

He looked around for awhile, mowed the lawn, and poked around more. But I stayed out of sight. I don't trust these people; I remember my car ride in that carrier. And then (this is the greatest part of all -- read closely Oscar) he filled my food bowl to the top before leaving! To the top!

Now I had a full bowl and the camp to myself! I clawed myself several times to make sure I hadn't died and gone to heaven. Sure enough, I was alive.

Again, I gorged on all the food immediately. Every bite.

By the next day, the family (and the two dogs -- sheesh, those things are big, clumsy, and loud) was back. I can't say I had really done much after all that food, but surprisingly, when they arrived, I noticed something: I was hungry again!

I let them bring me back to Richmond this time. But have no doubt: I see how things can be at the camp. I will be returning... make no mistake about it!

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